Darlings, you must, simply must, go read Badger's dismembering of the purple prose of Zorro. An excerpt:
"In the following months, Diego, whose blood was boiling with the pent-up desires of his seventeen years, found relief in Amalia's bosom.
[I guess they liked titty f*cking? With ... blood?]
They met at tremendous risk. By making love with a gadje she was violating a basic taboo, for which she could pay dearly. She had been a virgin when she married, the custom among the women of her people, and she had been faithful to her husband till the day he died. ...
[I guess that is an attempt to make her sound complicated... or just for it to be somehow okay that she be a huge slut with a 17 year old. After all, she was virtuous all the *rest* of the time! So it's really okay!]
Lives were lived in full view of the clan. Amalia did not have time or a place to be alone, but occasionally she was able to meet Diego in some quiet alleyway: there she would take him in her arms, always with the insufferable fear of being caught.
[So, let's get this clear - they have sex in a quiet alleyway?
Also: Insufferable fear? Sounds like she suffered it.]
I knew there was a reason Allende gave me hives.
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